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Fathers want Boys, But Mothers want Girls More.

Updated: Nov 17



On a sunny afternoon at the playground, a visibly pregnant woman shares a tender hope with her friend, "I really hope it's a girl this time." Her words resonate with a trend that’s sweeping across many societies, highlighting a notable change in family aspirations.


Global Desire for a Gender-Balanced Family

Most parents around the world share a common goal: to have both a son and a daughter. This ideal of a balanced family is deeply rooted and widespread. Marcia Summers, a Professor of educational psychology at Ball State University, captures this sentiment well: "Having a boy and a girl is considered the ideal American family according to research. Most people want a child of their own gender—mothers usually want a daughter, and most fathers want a son."


In Canada, a Royal Commission report revealed that nearly all prospective parents have a strong wish to have at least one child of each sex, highlighting the importance of a balanced family. This desire speaks to the deep-seated value placed on experiencing the joys and challenges of raising both genders. Research published in the Journal of Population Economics in 2014 reveals that couples with two children of the same gender often hope for a third child to balance the gender equation. This trend underscores the strong desire among parents to raise both daughters and sons.


Changing Preferences from Sons to Daughters

Traditionally, there has been a common preference for first-born sons, shaped by economic benefits and societal norms. However, recent studies indicate a significant transformation in these age-old trends, particularly in gender-equal societies. Research from Sweden shows an increasing preference for daughters over the past decade, a shift supported by new registry data on birth rates and parental surveys.


Robert Lynch's research on implicit gender preferences highlights that while both sexes have preferences for children of their own gender, women have a stronger inclination towards daughters than men do towards sons. This preference underscores the emotional and psychological factors that are increasingly influencing parental choices today.



This chart from Robert Lynch's study (2018) shows that parents often prefer children of their own gender. However, it highlights that women show a stronger preference for daughters compared to the preference men have for sons.


Emotional and Social Factors Driving the Preference for Daughters

The emotional connection between mothers and daughters often influences these preferences. Many women look forward to nurturing a unique mother-daughter relationship, anticipating shared experiences. Sociological studies suggest that early interactions with gender-typed toys, such as dolls, play a role in fostering a nurturing instinct from a young age, which may contribute to the preference for having daughters.

 

Sentiment Among Mothers with Sons

Particularly striking is the data pointing to the deep-seated desires among mothers who already have sons. According to a Sway natural survey:


  • 59% of women with a son have a strong preference for a daughter as their next child.

  • About a third of these women have actively considered methods to sway the likelihood of having a daughter.

  • More than 70% of women with a son are willing to change their diet to potentially influence their next child's gender.


Gender Disappointment: A Real and Emotional Experience

Take the example of Filippa, a 38-year-old mother from Berlin, who deeply wished for a daughter after having two sons. Despite loving her children, she found it challenging to reconcile with the idea of not having a daughter. Filippa and her partner initially expected to have a girl during their first pregnancy, and when it turned out to be a boy, they tried again 16 months later, only to have another boy. Filippa recalls her disappointment vividly, saying, "When the doctor told us, I was so sad. I almost cried." Stories like Filippa's shed light on the emotional dimensions of parental preferences, often referred to as "gender disappointment."


Further supporting the preference for daughters, recent research from the University of Warsaw shows that parents, particularly mothers, are more likely to have a second or third child if they have boys first, highlighting the desire to balance their family with a daughter.


Choosing Natural Over Invasive

While a minority of parents explore invasive methods like IVF for gender selection, most prefer non-invasive approaches. Dietary adjustments, supported by scientific evidence, are the most popular method among those aiming to influence their child’s gender naturally. At Sway natural, we provide scientifically backed guidance to support these personal choices without resorting to medical interventions.


A Positive Shift in Family Preferences

As societal norms continue to evolve, so do family dreams. The growing preference for daughters marks a positive shift from the historical preference for boys. This change reflects evolving values and enriches the diversity within families. Parents now seek the joys of raising both sons and daughters, striving for balance and fulfillment. For those wanting to boost their chances, natural gender swaying methods can help. Regardless of the outcome, it's essential to embrace diversity and create unique families where every individual is celebrated.


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